I have been thinking about this blog lately. About what it is and what it could be and what I want it to be. My problem is that I don't really have any idea of the answer to any of those questions. It isn't really anything now; it is not a place to share information or new ideas, and it is not a place where I try to entertain people. It's not useful or fun, and if it's not either of those, then what is it?
Seems to me that it is more or less a completely self-indulgent collection of my thoughts that I post in when I want to feel like someone wants to know what I think.
I tried having a blog where the goal was to be entertaining, but I ran out of inspiration after about a month. Even then, it was a mishmash of whatever happened to come to my head. It had no cohesive theme or plan. It was just me talking about whatever I happened to want to talk about at any given time. I just tried a little harder for it to be funny. (Which I'm still not sure that it was.)
This blog was always sort of a substitute diary. I feel that, in general, the internet is really better off without those. An individual's thoughts and babblings about their day to day lives (be it me or anyone else) generally speaking, do not interest anyone. No one on the internet really wants to hear how I feel about my day at work, or my armchair psychiatric analyses of why people are the way they are.
Further to that, no one really cares about the deliberation behind what my blog should be about or how it should be presented.
From here, the question becomes whether or not I should continue writing it, knowing that no one wants to hear what I have to say. Why do I try to keep a blog? For the benefit of other people, or myself? We've already covered the fact that it's not for other people, so what benefit does it have for me?
It keeps me literate, there is that. I don't do a lot of writing nowadays, unless it is in chat or email, so some practice is a good thing. That is something that I could do in a personal journal, though. I wonder if that might be a better place for it.
Some part of me still resists the idea of curling into my shell and ceasing my broadcast of inanity altogether. Maybe I just need to feel listened to.
And I like to draw while I watch television. There you have it.